Goofy Posted November 26, 2011 Report Share Posted November 26, 2011 Drafting Guys Over 60 This is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier... New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old totrack down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 tojoin the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards.Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to takeus old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unituntil you're at least 35. For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think aboutsex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think aboutsex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy. Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and acranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can'tsleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybeletting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves itwill make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.. An 18-year-old doesn't even liketo get up before 10am. Old guysalways get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like Isaid, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I mayas well be up killing somefanatical son-of-a-bitch.If captured we couldn't spill thebeans because we'd forget wherewe put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial numberwould be a real brainteaser.Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to gettingscreamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've alsodeveloped an appreciation for guns. We've been using themfor years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from thescreaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I'vebeen in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with ropehanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups aftercompleting basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I'venever seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's stilllearning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl.He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim toshade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keepour kids at home to learn a littlemore about life before sending them off into harm's way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. Thelast thing an enemy would want tosee is a couple million pissed offold farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who knowthat their best years are already behind them. HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!!You think MEN have attitudes??Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them onborder patrol. They'll have it secured the first night! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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