it's hell to be old

[Goofy]

It's Hell to be Old

OLD people have problems that you haven't

even considered yet!

An 85-year-old man was requested by his

Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical

exam.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take

this jar home and bring back a semen sample

tomorrow.'

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared

at the doctor's office and gave him the jar,

which was as clean and empty as on the

previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man

explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this--first I tried

with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried

with my left hand, but still nothing..

'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with

her right hand, then with her left, still nothing.

She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in,

then with her teeth out, still nothing.

'She even called up Arleen, the lady next door

and she tried too, first with both hands, then an

armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between

her knees, but still nothing.'

The doctor was shocked! 'You asked your

neighbor?'

The old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get

the jar open.'