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Goofy

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Posts posted by Goofy

  1. Bad Day

    in Randomness

    Posted

    There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a great huge, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

    "Well, whatcha' gonna do about it?" he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears.

    "Come on, man," the biker says, "I didn't think you'd CRY. I can`t stand to see a man crying."

    "This is the worst day of my life." I say. "I'm a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don't have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife with another man and then my dog bit me."

    "So, I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all, I buy a drink, I drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve; then, you show up and drink the whole thing! But, enough about me, how's your day going?"

  6. Seahawks Game

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    and too think the main issue is the pension plan, all the refs are asking for is 3.3 million to be put into their underfunded pension plan, for a league pulling in about 9 billion dollars a year that is pretty small amount to not agree too

  7. Seahawks Game

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    from TMZ

    The NFL is backing what's being called the WORST CALL IN LEAGUE HISTORY -- refusing to overturn last night's Seattle Seahawks touchdown against the Green Bay Packers ... and standing by their replacement refs.

    League officials released a statement moments ago, saying, "Referee Wayne Elliott determined that no indisputable visual evidence existed to overturn the call on the field, and as a result, the on-field ruling of touchdown stood."

    The NFL goes on to say upon even further review of the video today ... it supports the "decision not to overturn the on-field ruling" and the result of the game is final.

    In other news, NFL broadcasts are now available in braille.

  20. Wrong Bitch:

    in Randomness

    Posted

    The train was quite crowded and a U.S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat. There seemed to be one next to a well-dressed French woman, but when he got there, he saw it was taken by the woman's poodle.

    The war-weary Marine asked, "Ma'am, may I have that seat?"

    The French woman sniffed and said to no one in particular, "Americans are so rude. My little Fifi is using that seat."

    The Marine walked the entire train again, but the only seat available was under that dog. "Please, ma'am. May I sit down? I'm very tired."

    She snorted, "Not only are you Americans rude, you are also arrogant!"

    This time the Marine didn't say a word; he just picked up the little dog, tossed it out the train window and sat down.

    The woman shrieked, "Someone defend me! Put this American in his place!"

    An English gentleman sitting nearby spoke up. "Sir, you Americans seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You hold the fork in the wrong hand. You drive your autos on the wrong side of the road. And now, sir, you seem to have thrown the wrong bitch out the window.

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